Pointless Walks......

IT WAS AS THE STREET LAMPS LIT. THERE WAS A KNOCK. I JUST WANTED TO BE ALONE. I JUST WANTED TO BE ON MY OWN. THEY KNOCKED AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. I IGNORED IT. IT WOULDN'T GO AWAY. PERSISTENT. LIKE RAIN. VOLUME UP. VOLUME DOWN. NEITHER WOULD HELP. A KNOCKING. AGAIN. REPEATED LIKE SUNSHINE. LIKE CLOUDS. LIKE WEATHER. LIGHTS DARK. IN HIDING. PERSISENT. THE KNOCKING.

less and less and less. longer and longer and longer. It's so hard not to drink. I don't sleep. I wake up early. I go to work. I do mundane things I could do with my brain shut. I come home. I walk the dog. People are horrible to me. I watch some TV. I make some terrible food. I play games. I look at the internet. I go to bed. It's so hard not to drink. I don't sleep. I wake up early. I go to work. I do mundane things I could do with my brain shut. I come home. I walk the dog. People are horrible to me. I watch some TV. I make some terrible food. I play games. I look at the internet. I go to bed. It's so hard not to drink. I don't sleep. I wake up early. I go to work. I do mundane things I could do with my brain shut. I come home. I walk the dog. People are horrible to me. I watch some TV. I make some terrible food. I play games. I look at the internet. I go to bed. It's so...

Look how many times can I tell you. I don't do anything. I just sit around all day doing nothing of any worth. Played a few games, walked the dog watched two films. Thats me. 'Fighting with my Family' was great. A bit saggy in the middle but still good. I am target audience though so its probs rubbish. 'Green Book' is apparently the best film of all time. It's not. It's still perfectly enjoyable though. It's still like living in a windy rain tunnel. Or a rainy wind tunnel. Whatever. The Division 2 is vexing me because it's FAR TOO FUCKING HARD and also FAR TOO FUCKING HARD TO SEE ANYTHING ON THE SCREEN. Devil May Cry 5 is, erm, ok I guess (still needs Bayonetta in it). Lost 8000000 souls in Dark Souls to one of those ganky skeletons with a lance in the Undead Burg. Schoolboy. Nearly snapped my switch. Watched a bit of Adult Non Violent Entertainment. Had an argument about a Christmas tree (in March). Ate a sausage bagel, a cheese to...

What do I say when I don't have anything to say. I guess I say this. Nothing is happening. I have been on late shifts at work so just come home and do stupid things. Games update - The Division 2 give me eyestrain and is far too hard for what it is. Vexing. Devil May Cry 5 is like Bayonetta but without Bayonetta in it. As the best thing about Bayonetta is Bayonetta it makes it like a poor mans Bayonetta. Work update - much ado about nothing. They are all going to Alton Towers and having a party there but have gone through the diaries and picked the week I am on holiday (or more t the point sitting at home being miserable with nothing to do) so I can't go. They NEVER do cool stuff at work. This is like the first time ever. Can't go. Fuck my life. My brain is still craving easy things so instead of not reading Sylvia Plath I am now not reading Stephen King. It's weird they review records on the internet and can't play the music on it. It's a bit point...

So much noise. Always something going around in my head. Usually nonsense. It keeps me awake. Got up at 2am this morning because I had a landslide of nothing in there sliding around, The Divison 2 had unlicked to flopped around on that for a bit. It's a squint fest at the moment. Cannot see what's happening half the time. I need to spend at least 94 hours with this game. I hope I can adapt. Went to see Captain Marvel. It's half good and half rubbish. Far too space alieny for me but she is fantastic. 3 G's. Also bought 2 records one of which I like and once of which is rubbish and I shouldn't have bought in the first place. The guy that I used to work with there is STILL there and he is always really pleased to see me as we got on so well back then. That job would have been an amazing part time job. Full time it sucked ass though. The only thing that made it tolerable was theft, drugs and getting pissed. One of which I got sacked for which led to the end of days....

Woke up to the most pathetic snow in the world which had been rained away 30 mins later. The weather is grim. It's windy and cold and hailing/raining. Apart from a brief walk to the cow park hid inside all day. There are 79 Mr Men books (so far) and none of them are the same (so I am told). UPDATE ACTUALLY 80. Battery on car dead. Charged. Battery on charger dead won't charge. I drive about once every hundred weeks so thats not surprising but still a pain in the arse Other than that. Bit of Dark Souls bit of Assasins Creed Odesyee (which from now on is ACO due to being impossible to spell for a bear with little brain). Watching the literal clock tick down for The Division 2 to unlock. Then I can have friends (please). Watched half of BlaKKKKKKKKKKKlansman last night but too tired to stick with it so turned it off half way through. Might watch the end tonight. Might not. So a perfectly average boring Sunday. I was going to say what food I ate but I am not that boring...

Another day (well 5 ½ hours) in the fast paced world of IT support. It’s raining. There was a man who wouldn’t get out of my way on the pavement this morning. He had his headphones on and looked like he was listening to angry music that made him feel empowered. I just smiled and moved out the way. Walked past Mandy who was walking really slowly. Didn’t want to get locked in and have to make polite conversation for 10 minutes while I walked into work. Wanted to carry on listening to Run the Jewels (1). Shouted across the road and picked up speed. Job done.  This kind of thing happens every now and again. It’s terrible. If wad a better person I would match her speed and have a nice chat. What about though? What would I chat to her about? I would imagine she is as relieved as me. Probs more so. Hearing about disasters in the lives of other people. Good to know it’s not just me.  Marvel and Game of Thrones chat. Thrilling.  First person calling in. Didn’t ...