Skip to main content

December 3rd

Quench Quake Grapefruit & Tangerine Sour 4.6%

I don't even know what this is supposed to be. It tastes like a bag of sweets that has gone off.

I can hear my dog being blow-dried and an episode of 'Can't Pay' that I have seen before is on. I can't get the Fire Stick to work (no surprise there) so I can't watch what I actually want to.

Work was like amazing. So glad to see everyone again. I have missed them all so much. At this point I wish Waynes World was still a thing.

Couldn't sleep so got up at about 4am and watched the world go past on my wall. Insomnia is the worst disease not homophobia.

Waiting for a man to come and tell me how much it will be to fix the roof while he quietly judges me.

However much it is it will be too much. I hope he's not creepy like the last one.

I put ibuprofen gel on my arms and it makes me feel weird. A detachment. I always detached. The world just happens around me.

Am I repeating myself? I feel like I am.

Am I repeating myself? I feel like I am.

Whoever the two of you are who read this. Why? For Gods sake why?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Penultimate

This is not a suicide note.  I am not allowed to do that. That would make me the bad guy. If things were a bit different though I would deffo be eating toast in the bath. I hope I get ill again. That would be perfect. The only problem with getting ill last time was that I got better. I was ready. I was ‘at peace’. Then, as now, I have had enough. I am always tired, I always hurt. I am never shown any love and I don’t really do anything I enjoy. All the things I am supposed to enjoy either I don’t or I get stopped from doing by other people who are supposed to care about me. I am now old enough to know I will never get what I want in my life. This is it, my best days are behind me and I wasted them on making do. The sun comes out and I get sunburn in the hope that it will fix my skin. In the hope it will make me better. It just makes my skin fall off in different ways and hurt from a new angle. I look for stuff to fill the box I live in. The space is getting smaller and ...

The Last Sunflower

  This is love. This is from a place of love. This is from love island. I am an internet stalker. I watch and I look. Sometimes I smile and sometimes I cry. I like to know that you are ok. Are you ok? You seem ok. You seem happy. That makes me happy. I am glad you are where you are right now. Even if it killed me to get you there. Slowly. I am transitional. I am the inbetweener. I do it all the time. I hope it works out for everyone. It never really works out for me, but I get people there. That is my X-Man power.  When I met you, you were pretending to be happy. You weren’t happy although you had the sweetest smile. It even spread to your eyes sometimes when you weren’t looking. Super cute. Supergirl.  I used to listen to you telling everyone how blissful you were. I believed you. I believed you for about a year. Then I found out that wasn’t the case. Bruises and all. And then we were happy for a bit Not for very long. Just for a bit and why? Why would you be happy with ...